1. You know a lot about wine
2. You’re wearing a beret
3. Your lungs are slowly morphing into gills
4. You call any form of transportation “The Metro”
5. You have a fundamental understanding of how the British Empire irrevocably shaped the Western world
6. You’re hung like a fucking horse
7. You have been breathing underwater for 19 successive minutes now
8. You get art
The Groundhog 